Dance Flick

Lochlyn Munro,Chris Elliott,Marlon Wayans,Amy Sedaris

Dance showdown. Thomas Uncles and his crew are engaged in a dance off, Thomas pees on the competition, a dancer who spins so fast he drills into the floor. The judge asks for a rematch. Thomas doesn't want to bet someone else's money on the match, but one of his crew says they can win if they pull off a signature move. Thomas warns against it since the person who does the move could become crippled for life. He disregards what Thomas is saying and bets 5,000 on the outcome of the match. Thomas crew member, D, takes up the challenge and does a special move on his head. However, the other team put oil on the floor and D flies out of the building and dies. Thomas's team loses and their boss is angry that they lost 5,000 $.Megan White (Shoshana Bush) is on a train. Megan recounts how she used to be a ballet dancer. Her mother was on her way to the competition when she was in a crash. Ignored by people who wanted to steal free gas, her mother was forced to get out of the car on her on. She gets hit by several cars until Halle Berrys Catwoman hits her with her car and forces her into an open grave.Meanwhile, Megan dances for the judges in a scene which parodies Abigail Breslins dance routine at the end of Little Miss Sunshine until the judges reject her and then tell her that her mom died. Thomas and his partner arrive at their boss's house. he gives them 1 week to get his money back. Megan is picked up by her father at the train station and he asks her if she has any baggage. She responds that he left her when she was 10, her mom is dead, and that she hasn't been on a date in a year because of her looks. Her dad cuts her off and tells her he means luggage. She points to all the luggage covering the station and tells him they are hers. Outside music school mother tells her son Ray that there is no way to beat around the bush and that he is her blind son. He tells her he knows, and she tells him that he's on his own and kicks him out of the car. He falls into an open manhole.Megan walks around her new school with the principal who scolds a couple for wearing a condom and tells a graffiti artist to use spray paint. The principal gives Megan her locker and leaves her. Megan meets her neighbor Charity, a girl with a baby who gave birth during a dance off. Charity says she brings baby, so she knows her baby is safe. Charity then hangs her baby in the locker and leaves for class.In class, an overweight girl Tracy flirts with Jack. Tracy asks if Jack has a dance partner for the Romeo and Juliet performance. Jack is obviously gay. The acting professor comes in and starts asking the students what they are willing to do for art. Thomas launches into a streak of insulting Employee of the Month, while Megan defends the movie saying that she saw it 4 times. The teacher points out that most actors are white. He tells the class that the one thing all actors have is dignity, and then establishes the fact that he sold out for money. Megan goes to her dance lesson with her teacher Mrs. Cameltoe, who goes through them and starts insulting every student. One student commits suicide from the comments. Meanwhile, Jack is playing basketball with his dad. Jack asks if its OK to want to try something new and begins describing gay sex graphically. His father mistakes it for wanting to join the wrestling team. Megan is at lunch and tries to sit with the rich dancers, but they insult her and force her to leave.A lunch singing dance scene takes off. Jack leads it and comes out of the closet. A girl named Nora is trying to find a dance partner but none of the guys can handle her weight. She only weighs 97 pounds. The janitor lifts her, but she farts, so he throws her over his shoulder. Charity tells Megan about a dance party that's happening that night and asks if she's 21. Megan is not, so they arrange her an ID. Charity and Megan meet up with her friends and Charity gives Megan a makeover in a car. When Megan comes out, she's colored. Megan is alone at the bar and Thomas comes over. Charity tells her baby daddy that they should have another kid, and he bolts.Thomas & Megan dance in a really lame manner reminiscent of dance revolution. Thomas and his partner run into the dance crew they lost to early. They trade insults before bouncing out of the club. Thomas leaves angry and Megan follows him wanting to find out more. Thomas offers to work on dance moves with her. The next day they work on their dance moves. He tells her she needs to be more aggressive and then he ends up beating her brutally when she pushes him. Thomas tells her he doesn't want to be a thug forever and that he wants to be a doctor so that he can work on vaginas.Charity and Megan are in her room when the Baby Daddy arrives to pick up his son. He picks him up for 5 seconds. Thomas gets into Just Community College and there's a lot of Congratulations passed around. Thomas then takes Megan out to celebrate, in a showing of MY MOM DIED IN A CAR CRASH a performance about Megans mom. Thomas tells her that her mom's death was her fault since she set ridiculous expectations. Thomas tells her that if she wants to get into Julliard she needs to move past the baggage. They're about to kiss when some black girls walk by, and Thomas pretends not to know her.Thomass boss sends thugs to collect Akon and Thomas. He tries to signal Megan to call the cops by telling her to call him at 9:11, that he bought Police concert tickets and that there's a marathon of COPS on television that she should look into. She's oblivious so Thomas is taken to his presumed death. The boss is angry that Akon and Thomas don't have his money. He enters them into the next dance battle and tells them that they better win.Cut to basketball. The girls are playing basketball in the gym. Nora starts mocking Megan before showing that Thomas recorded them having sex (One Night in Megan) and started selling it. The two-start fighting in the gym. Jacks' dad is there whipping the men's wrestling team into shape and starts screaming at them with homosexual innuendos riddling the speech. Jack screams in support of it, and his dad thinks its good team spirit and agrees with him. Charity says that Nora is just an oppressed white girl and Megan takes offense to that saying that she paid her dues. It shows Megan receiving a DUI and attempting to Fellate an officer when he asks her to blow on the breathalyzer.Meanwhile, Akon hatches a plan to kill their boss in order to avoid paying back the debt. Thomas doesn't want to do it. During a dance session with Thomas, Megan dumps him because they spend more time defending their relationship than having one. Thomas leaves and starts dancing in the rain to vent his frustrations and prep for the dance off. During his routine he's electrocuted by lightening.Charity brings her son to the playground and the Baby Daddy shows up. He asks to talk and lets her know that things are going to be different and that he wants to be a better father even though he doesn't know his son's name. He wants his son to wake up every morning and see his face. The Baby Daddy leaves a picture of himself and tells her to hang it on the baby's wall. He then leaves. Thomas meets up with Akon and his friends and tells them that he's not going to participate in a drive by on their boss. Akon tells him that he can't go to J.C.C. like Thomas and tells him that his life is that of a gangster. They drive off to kill the boss, leaving Thomas alone.Megan hears about the fact that Thomas is 5,000 dollars in debt and starts to set up a crew to win the dance battle. Megan grabs Tracy, Nora and Jack to form a crew to win the contest money. Just as the winner is about to be announced by the judge, Thomas arrives and challenges the crew that beat him in the beginning. Megan arrives with her crew and the dance off begins. Akon arrives to back up Thomas telling him that someone else already took out their boss. The crews face off and pull off a well-choreographed routine. Megan falls down and suffers with self-doubt. She starts dancing like a stripper on a poll (including spinning around the poll with her teeth).Akon and Thomas start dancing with roller skates and shorts. Akon carries Thomas on his head and little disco balls come out of Thomass shorts. The Judge announces that the dance off is a tie. He gets angry at the decision of the panel and tells the crew that each crew gets one dance move, and that the audience will decide the winner. The other crew steals D performed before he died. Hope seems lost when Thomas and Akon's fat boss arrives and starts dancing. He pulls off a killer fat man routine which impresses the judges panel and the audience. The boss crushes the leader of the other team, leaving him pressed into the floor and winning the competition.Megan and Thomas reconcile as Mrs. Cameltoe arrives. Megan tells Mrs. Cameltoe that the only way to earn respect is on the street. Mrs. Cameltoe starts beat boxing with her vagina. On prom night, Thomas and Megan go to the dance together. Thomas asks if Megan knows her and tells her that she needs to see him in the light. He tells her he should be afraid and turns into a blue vampire. Megan tells her he's not scary and that she's just disappointed. He returns to normal, and they dance. They're about to kiss when Megan sees some white guys and pretends not to know Thomas.